26 March 2021

Cod, bob, and sods’ odd jobs

 

The sods ‘threatened’ a war for the sake of the odd cod
While throwing away far more than the odd bob

Not even blowing away the odd cod for bob
Just blowing away more than the odd bob

For the love of 'cod'
For the sake of 'cod'
Take the country out into the cold

From the cold war
To cod war
 
For 'cod's' sake
Not for the country's sake
But for the sods' sake

Not even pollocks
but sods' bollocks
hog's bollocks
Codswallop

No cod
Just the sod

Oh, what a tangled sodweb sods weave
When first sods practise to deceive

Rather than the sods bringing to their people bob from the cod
The sods give their country only plenty of the taste of the rod

Only very odd sods
Can do such odd jobs
Shoddy jobs

Odd sods
Sods’ odds
 
Sods' rule
Sods' law

'Cod' rule
Mob rule

The queerer the populist 
The dearer the populist is to the voter

Bob rule 
But only for the sake of sod rule

Sods
With the brain of cods

Easy peasy
Demon sleazy

Better than bob sodded off
Is for the sods to sod off!

Hickory dickory dock. The politician went in the dock
The clock struck one. The politician went down
Hickory dickory dock
Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock, tick tock

Grand Balcon de Toulouse

 

Antoine Comte de Saint-Exupéry in his time had a habit of staying in the same room at the Hôtel du Grand Balcon when visiting Toulouse. This was a room with a window opening with a wonderful view to the Place du Capitole, the central city square with the city hall elegantly in full view (pictured above but not from his room). At the floor below his room was the grand balcon on the northwest corner of the square,

I was able to visit the original room in 1999 when some of my relatives stayed in the room during their visit to Toulouse. On one of my visits to the room, on a beautiful summer evening, I could see downstairs a stylish young couple sitting at the grand balcon romantically at a small table with a chair for each and a bottle of white wine on the table with a wine glass each. They looked as if they were on honeymoon or on a romantic weekend. This beautiful sight has stayed in my mind.

The Saint-Exupéry room was not as luxurious as one might have expected. In 1999, the hotel did not even seem to be in the best state of repairs. I however very much liked the original interiors of the fine old building even in their then state of not quite the best of repairs which almost added more character and originality. As I remember, the building had a fine tiled floor from the main entrance through an elegantly wide and high front door to a stylish and spacious entrance hall of high ceilings leading directly opposite to the front door to a beautiful staircase with an antique ascenseur. More recently it seems that the interiors of the building have been very much modernised and although I have not dared go in, I fear the worst in terms of loss of original character and detail, as has happened in recent decades and continues to happen in so many other places. At least at the Grand Balcon not quite everything original inside seems to have disappeared but lowered ceilings certainly do not impress me. 

En English equivalent, a room with a view in the Great Victoria Hotel in Bradford


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After about ten years of having this Parker Duofold fountain pen, it seems that I may have finally learned how to write with it. The trick seems to be to press as lightly as possible when writing. It is not a whip after all (even whips can work best if not used too hard, depending on use, recipient and taste...). 

Until now I have cursed this pen as the worst and least cost effective one I ever had, as it is the most expensive pen I ever bought (from Selfridges) but it has written worse than any other with little ink going into the actual writing but plenty on the fingers and everywhere inside the pen other than the part that would get it to write. If one leaves it on the bed, it will most efficiently and expediently spread ink on the white bed sheets.

Even when it occasionally does write, it then suddenly stops in the middle of a meeting or hearing when one quickly has to find something else to continue writing. 

It seems that the only way to really make the Duofold write is to dip it in an ink bottle, little better than a quill pen - such is the development of writing instruments! 

One does wonder if it is designed for the nouveau riche who would typically only wish to show it off without actually ever writing much anything with it. On some thinner papers it seems to write better and less so on thicker papers. I had the pen even repaired once but with little improvement. 

This American product Packup Duofold like Hewlett Packup (not Hewlett Backup) seems to have the quality of American cars rather than classic Anaheim Factory Old Skool 36 DX Vans, Air Force Ones and Converses - the Superdry of fountain pens. If it was cheaper one would probably chuck it. Maybe best to flog it.

If one has a waterproof mobile phone, one should of course be careful to drop it in water rather than on the rocks on the beach, which breaks the glass screen, by which redesign the mobile ceases to be waterproof, as one later discovers when dropping it in water. If at least the droppings had occurred in the opposite order... Of course the new phone which one then drops into water first turns out not to be waterproof even by first design. 

Another item for comment is a briefcase by Aspinal. While it certainly looked splendid to begin with it did not last too well as bits came off and the lock stopped working surprisingly quickly considering that it cost an arm and a leg leaving of course one to carry it but a bit difficult to kick it with one foot. The faux leather seems to age as well as modern or contemporary "architecture".

Turning to something with considerably better value for money, one can find cheap online a manual coffee grinder to replace or complement an electric coffee bean grinder in an attempt to reduce one's personal pollution through unnecessary electricity consumption. One can also benefit from some exercise in one's hands. It can however take longer even if one learns to do it as fast as possible manually. With any difficulty of getting the coffee beans to go into the right place through the manual grinder one can also make some samba dance moves to shake the grinder to the desired effect or even try to tempt the lady of the house to to perform if not risking enjoyment of the swift movement of the rolling pin.



22 March 2021

Native Charm of Sheerness-on-Sea, Overseas, etc.

Sheerness has some of the best sea to swim near London. This is largely due to the temperatures in Sheerness being in the last few years usually the warmest of any seaside near London. Also, the beach is consistently easy to swim in with reliable water levels without the water retreating into the sea and leaving a muddy mess like in Southend-on-Sea sometimes and without any slippery or treacherous ground (other than maybe the odd local youth throwing stones at visitors). The colour of the sea water near the Thames Estuary is not the prettiest blue but rather olive if one does not offend any Brexit natives by comparison to something growing only or best overseas. The beach has been awarded the European Blue Flag for cleanliness and safety.


Despite even history as a seaside resort, nowadays Sheerness could probably make more of its seaside but maybe the local council’s sense of entrepreneurship is that of the Brexiteer who seems to think that prosperity comes from closing away and cutting links with the largest and nearest market which the European Union is to the United Kingdom at a time when countries more than ever rely on international trade for their prosperity. It seems that much has changed since one of the first co-operative societies was situated in Sheerness.  

The area has some colourful history as reported in KentOnline on 21 September 2020:

The area at that time was known to be popular with smugglers. It was considered shady but necessary so residents learned to “turn one's back while the gentlemen went by”. Which is how we understand illicit contraband ended up in the church belfry.

KentOnline also recounts the legend of Grey Dolphin and Sir Robert de Shurland, of Shurland Hall, Eastchurch:

In those days Sheppey was covered in woods and was an ideal hunting ground. Indeed, Henry Vlll is recorded as staying at Shurland Hall with Anne Boleyn... Sir Robert was "a stocky man of considerable strength and quick temper."

Sir Robert also had the right to claim possession of any wreck or flotsam and jetsam which came within reach of his lance at low tide. To this end, his father Sir Roger had started training his most capable horses to swim off the coast of Sheppey to seek out sinking ships and Sir Robert carried on the practice.

One evening as Sir Robert quaffed ale and devoured a plate of Faversham oysters he became aware of a commotion. Villagers had discovered the body of a sailor washed up on the beach and were pleading with the priest to bury it.

But Father Fothergill, a plump and portly Augustine friar based at Minster Abbey was unsure the cadaver should be buried in consecrated ground and refused. Word was that this 'grinning sailor' had previously been buried in Chatham and then been dug up and thrown back into the sea.

Hearing that the priest was refusing to bury the body, Sir Robert in a rage called for his 'kicking' boots and summoned the man of God. A violent confrontation was coming.

"Bury me that grinning caitliff!" insisted the baron.

The chaplain argued back: "Water and earth alike reject him."

"Give him his passport to Heaven," returned Sir Robert.

"He has already gone to Hell," stammered the friar.

As the baron reached for his sword, which he called Tickletoby, the friar turned to run and the baron lashed out with his foot.

Ingoldsby says: "It was but one kick but such a one!"

The friar landed heavily into the already dug grave and died as the force of the fall broke his neck. The baron, in a foul rage, ordered the body of the sailor be hauled in on top and the two buried together.

In those days the church was very powerful and enjoyed the full protection of the king. News of this shocking event soon spread to Canterbury. A crime against the church was a crime against the king so an army arrived at Sir Robert's front door. Any other man would have been quaking in his boots but Sir Robert merely took them all on and won.

But he realised he would still need a royal pardon. King Edward l (1272 to 1307) was to sail past Sheppey on his royal barge to inspect his navy moored at The Nore which was preparing to go into battle against the French.

So Sir Robert dashed to his stables and had his favourite steed Grey Dolphin saddled up. The horse had been specially trained for swimming out to sea.

The pair swam two miles to the king's ship battling strong tides and wind.

"What have we here?" asked the King.

"It's a mermaid or the Devil," suggested his courtiers.

As the baron had fought alongside the king in the Holy Wars he was granted his pardon and, clutching it to his chest, turned his horse around to swim back to shore.

But once on dry land the exhausted pair were met by an "ugly old woman" who warned the baron: "Make much of your steed. He has saved your life but he shall yet be the means of you losing it."

... "Sir Robert was as superstitious as everyone else in those days and was aghast. Grey Dolphin was his favourite horse and yet he valued his own life more than the horse.

"So to thwart the hag's prophecy he took his sword and sliced through the horse’s neck. Grey Dolphin, weakened by the swim and now struck by a fatal blow dropped to the stones, dead. A distraught Sir Robert buried the horse where it lay."

According to Thomas Ingoldsby, three years later Sir Robert was walking along the same beach at Scrapsgate when he spotted the bleached skull of Grey Dolphin sticking up out of the stones. Angry at losing his favourite horse he lashed out with his foot. The force was so strong that one of the teeth from the skull penetrated his boot and lodged in his toe.

Sir Robert returned to Shurland Hall and was forced to take to his bed. The splinter of bone caused blood poisoning leading to gangrene. Within days Sir Robert De Shurland was dead. The witch's prophecy had been fulfilled.

 

Clock tower of 1902 commemorating the coronation of King Edward VII 

Sheerness has much fine Georgian, Victorian, and Edwardian architecture even if it is not maintained very well. The local Conservative Club seems to be based in a surprisingly fine Victorian building, considering the Party’s increasingly impressive record in destroying extensively British heritage. At least they have added some hideous 1970s style lowered internal ceilings, consistent with the lowered standards of the once moderate Party that even brought the United Kingdom into the European Community but latterly with leaders sinking to the classic politicians' cheap trick of seeking to shift blame abroad, e.g. to the EU, for their own domestic failure to contribute to the success of many areas of the UK. Already Horace said, delirent reges, plectuntur Achivi (the kings err, the Greeks are punished). An old proverb says that it hurts most when your own dogs bite you. The current party is not even a cheap reproduction (that was New Labour, blue tits up 1997) but a downright fake (blue tits up 2016 and 2019). At least the Conservatives have some claim to versatility, bringing both the worst and (formerly) the best to the nation, the latter represented by moderate people like Kenneth Lord Clarke and Dominic Grieve.


One treat before lockdown was the local beauty pageant in the summer displaying the substantial attractiveness of the local belles, with aesthetic gravitas, all testifying to the aesthetic benefits of a traditional nationalist English diet rich in mouth-melting fat, salt, sugar and saturates, the sheerness of the celluloid. One can only impatiently wait for such great entertainment to resume under the unrepentantly conpetent handling of the pandemic by the infinitely wise government, to restore this celebration of Brexit Britain, to heavily outshine such dreadful skinny European fashion as one might endure in Paris or Milan. Each to their own!    

Indeed, for the self-marginalising isolationist, xenophobic and above all racist Brexiteer attractively few aliens seem be in Sheerness, which seems to remain a largely native Tory and Brexit old f*rtland. It was reported in 2013 that a group of Jewish school children was warmly welcomed by the local youths who threw stones and eggs at them. It can be an exciting adventure to visit Sheerness.

One wonders about Sheerness, but people usually become wiser as they become older. One exception seems to be the elderly people who voted for Brexit - 'there is no fool like the old fool.' They seem to have proved themselves worthy of the Viking concept of elderly care. In Aland there is still a cliff off which elderly people were pushed which is not even materially different from contemporary western government policy on the care of the elderly. Luckily there are no cliffs in Sheerness, only the white cliffs in Dover, another fine pearl of Kent, cherished by the British political élite. After both major political parties have done such an excellent job in creating deprived areas around the country, the Tories now try to make the whole country a deprived area.


Old wisdom has it that it is good to have ones friends near and ememies far. However, as ‘global’ Britain purportedly begins to trade with the rest of the world other than the too close for comfort EU even if in smaller quantity and quality than was the case within the EU, doubtless the benefits of this nouveau prosperity will soon reach Sheerness like the British political élite's efforts in looking after deprived areas of industrial decline for decades in the UK. But maybe better not to take 'global' Britain’s new exotic trading partners there for recreation unless they are interested to encounter at close quarters local stones and eggs being pelted at them, echoing the Brexiteers’ appreciation for prosperity from the EU. Indeed, such terrible ‘citizens of nowhere’ could surely never appreciate such a wonderfully parochial locality at the doorstep of the still cosmopolitan metropolis of London.  

Have the formidable locals however understood their own area? By going and living elsewhere, especially in another country, one can also discover one's own area better, not that one has to abandon one’s own origins and heritage but maybe improve and complement it with other inspirations – like discovering how to eat healthier, tastier, and more varied food. Not too many English people in Spain or elsewhere abroad however seem to have embraced the local culture and cuisine, rather exporting their parochial lack of sophistication, but the same can be said of various other Northern Europeans, not only the English. Like many other places, they could make more of it themselves, not remain stuck in a never-moving inertia, not expect only others from elsewhere to make something of it, like we must live our own lives ourselves and make something of it ourselves rather than expecting someone else to live it for us, like we can only think individually independently ourselves and not let only others think for ourselves. 

In Hints on Etiquette by Charles William Day in 1842 it is rightly said that: 

There is no more common or absurd mistake than supposing that, because people are of high rank, they cannot be vulgar; – or that, if people be in an obscure station, they cannot be well bred.

Gentility is neither in birth, manner, nor fashion – but in the MIND.

Living proof of all these elements is at the very top of the leadership of Brexit... 

People who grow up ‘abroad’ with other people from all over the world, can feel home in the kind of international environment that one can find in London for example. While the worst nationalists can have surprisingly cosmopolitan ancestry, the Cosmopolitan can be of anything but Cosmopolitan ancestry  from the same families in the backwoods marrying each other for centuries, frustrated and bored by not finding anything more exotic in the DNA test than less than 0.01 percent Central Asian, Melanesian, and Sub-Saharan African, for example, the rest 99.6 to 100 percent being of just one national origin and even on the documented ancestry having to be content with the nearest known ancestor of another nationality being 800 years ago from Scotland and even that with no documentary proof, leaving any Scots in their veins more likely to be something other than blood. They are nomads of a slightly different kind to the fine horsemen of Darfur, one of whom as a refugee ended up in the UK riding one of the Queen’s horses in the races, as recounted in The Journey by Abdul Musa Adam. Like gentility, cosmopolitanism is also less in birth and fashion and more in the mind. 

Every country has its good and bad sides and no country is better or worse than another like no person is better or worse than another. Every country has its parochialism and cosmopolitanism. As Dimitri Shostakovich in his Memoires tells us, under Stalin it was no longer permitted to say French bread which was renamed town bread. Incidentally Stalinists called Jews Cosmopolitans which was meant to be insulting while people who call themselves Cosmopolitans rather like it, like Cavaliers came to like what was originally a term of abuse. Like some people find fat attractive while others prefer slim, some like Cosmopolitan and others do not, but we should respect different views and not think our views are the only right ones. 

As the fine European-British Actor Sir Dirk Bogarde described xenophobic middle class Britain "... in their dreary little bungalows outside... Budleigh Salterton [pronounced like Bugley or ugly sod... ] pottering about in their rain-drenched gnome-ridden gardens...  loathing all bloody foreigners, hating and mistrusting anything beyond their sceptered isle... when I think of that it makes me really ill..."  

In 1935, the Composer Richard Strauss wrote:

Do you believe I am ever, in any of my actions, guided by the thought that I am 'German'? Do you suppose Mozart was consciously 'Aryan' when he composed? I recognise only two types of people: those who have talent and those who have none.

One step further left from the extreme left brings one to the extreme right and vice versa, like Communism and national socialism, like the union of the far right Trump and the far left Putin, like stone-pelting xenophbes in Sheerness and the haters of 'citizens of nowhere' are unified in similarity with Stalinists and cheaply reproducing the Iron Curtain in the English Channel and making the North Korea of Europe of the UK  where the Soviets failed the Brexiteers succeeded. 

Similarly some fashionably extreme left-wing radicals of the late 1960s few decades later became the best capitalists and Trump supporters, nouveau enriching themselves to the extent of buying fine country houses from the aristocrats who no longer could not afford to maintain what had been in their families for centuries  to the manor not born, turning their coats to fill their pockets! 

A chilling example of how much extremists on all sides have in common is, how rioters seem more interested in stealing beer and televisions, than promoting any even purportedly legitimate cause, as could be seen in far-left 'protests' against the police killing a Black suspect and purportedly anti-immigration protests by the far-right.  

The extreme left of Bolsheviks and the extreme right of republicans have more in common than the moderate centre ground where most decent people are in Sheerness as elsewhere. 

"Though I am a native here and to the manner born, it is a custom more honoured in the breach than the observance" (Hamlet).




Footnote: in such seaside places like Great Yarmouth one sees no bicycles in the cycle lane but rather a cavalcade of mobility scooters whose native white riders nowadays would be offended by being called merely 'fat' as the correct word is of course the far more flattering 'enormous'! There is a market for an entire shop selling mobility scooters - Costa del Dole.

08 March 2021

J'Accuse...! Contemporary Guernica of European Fascism - Nouveau Apartheid




Fasces, a bundle of rods tied around an axe, was an ancient Roman symbol of the authority of the civic magistrate. The Italian fascists took their name and symbol from this. Many state authorities in countries all over the world may not use these symbols but their actions in substance remain highly authoritarian to put it mildly.

The same symbol is however still used by various U.S. authorities (maybe the police that shoot first and ask questions only after that - even more expedient than leading questions maybe) and the République française. Indeed, it is highly appropriate that the French republic should use such a fascist symbol, considering the brutality of the French riot police – Compagnies républicaines de sécurité, CRS – in harassing asylum seekers, including children, in Calais, Dunkirk, and elsewhere in France, as reported by Human Rights Watch and others – hate in a cold climate. J'accuse...!

Asylum-seeking children in France learn not to be alone on streets without eyewitnesses as that is likely to lead to a beating by French police, leaving asylum-seekers almost in safer hands with criminals - liberté, égalité, fraternité, rather the Pays des Frères Fouettards. These vague and general principles seem to be interpreted selectively and 'liberally' (to put it politely) like in the old joke, 'shall we divide this fraternally or half and half?!' There is however something supremely wonderful about French politics, bins are named poubelles after the politician Eugène-René Poubelle who made them compulsory, something that was rather progressive in fact, by no means the worst politician, it would seem. 

Much seems to have changed in a century and not for the better. One of the first child refugees to make the journey from Greece across Europe to France and the UK was one Prince Philip of Greece and Denmark who's grandmother was an Imperial Russian Grand Duchess who had already a few years earlier lost her country of birth... 'Following the First World War a platoon of African-American soldiers, known as the Harlem Hell Fighters, had been so enamoured of France's practice of liberty, equality and fraternity that they remained there', making Paris 'for any jazz lover... a slice of heaven known as 'Harlem in Montmartre' (The Baroness by Hannah Rothschild, p. 102).

Even people traffickers for all their evil and violence at least bring their victims to safe countries sometimes which is in some sense more than one can say of modern or contemporary western governments' record of offering protection by doing much to stop people seeking protection. By government design of both major parties, there is no lawful way to enter the UK to claim asylum. (By comparison, for example, the Dutch authorities returned Jews to Nazi Germany if their documents were not deemed to be in order in the late 1930s.) Otherwise, there would be no or little business for the traffickers. The Channel walker was convicted for his way of entry by the UK justice system despite even being accepted as a genuine refugee, but the government is clearly largely above the law and justice. 

It is a criminal offence to traffic somebody to the UK and it is also an offence to enter the UK in any way to claim asylum, but it seems to be no crime at all to sell weapons to dictatorial regimes that commit crimes against humanity and whose persecution of their own people causes migration.

The vulgar bigots of contemporary Western politics and parvenu profiteurs are the big crooks compared to which people traffickers are but little fish. What the vulgar politicians and big business do not say is how, for example, the EU abuses its economical power by driving down African agriculture to artificially subsidise failing European agriculture while also driving down the quality of agriculture - nouveau fascist economical policy. Contemporary global material inequality and exploitation may be even worse than colonialism, all a major cause of the migration from Africa, Asia and Southern America to Europe and the Western world. A more egalitarian  international agricultural policy could help significantly to reduce or eliminate this problem. Useless, self-serving, and feeble political leaders in Africa and Asia and Southern America are not helping their people either. 

The Janus-faced politicians criticise people traffickers for seeking to profit from the misery of refugees. Profiting from the misery of refugees is of course a prerogative of politicians who win elections through hate speech against refugees and the companies to which western governments outsource immigration detention centres, other asylum "accommodation" and deportation to dictatorial countries. These companies owned by people close to politicians are paid from taxpayers' money from which the companies try to keep as much profit as possible by delivering the cheapest poor-quality service to the vulnerable recipient  daylight corruption and even worse daylight hypocrisy of knowingly profiting from trafficking and modern day slavery  by big companies connected to politicians. The hypocrisy with ignorance and stupidity is of course one of the most common forms of government and society of all times all over the world.

Indeed the biggest crooks are in politics (left, right and even centre), government and big business (plus quam imperfectum). The Marquis de Sade as a true Platonic philosopher aristocrat wrote about them in a letter to a friend in 1783:

By what right does this pack of leeches – which laps up the people's misfortunes, and which by its outrageous monopolies plunges this unfortunate class (whose sole crime is to be weak and poor) into the cruel necessity of losing either its honour or it's life, and in the latter case leaving it no other choice than to lose it through poverty or on the scaffold – what right, I ask you, do these monsters have to demand virtues?

 

Machiavelli described them thus (to note the substantial difference between the fine aristocrat and the oligarch, the latter is described here - emphasis added):


But to make plain what I mean when I speak of gentlemen, I say that those are so to be styled who live in opulence and idleness on the revenues of their estates, without concerning themselves with the cultivation of these estates, or incurring any other fatigue for their support. Such people are very mischievous in every republic or country... men of this sort are the sworn foes of all free institutions.   

This is the case even despite the detention estate including nothing less than the 19th-century hunting castle of the Dukes of Hamilton, Dungavel House in Scotland, even if more recent recipients of hospitality there have enjoyed themselves considerably less than members of the erstwhile Ducal hunting entourage. (The first illegal entrant due there even if never getting there was Rudolf Hess. When news of his departure reached the Berliners, they joked that the thousand-year Reich had become a hundred-year Reich as one zero had fallen off, as the Russian refugee, Princess Marie Wassiltschikoff recounts in her Berlin Diaries...).

Western governments are concerned about people coming to seek protection but not concerned about sending them to danger of death and lack of freedom. When children are in safer hands almost with organised criminals rather than the governments of the countries leading in human rights, then something is wrong! 

As if it was not bad enough to flee one's village in Darfur as a child with a few others, running for one's life quite literally, as two of the children were caught and not only killed but slaughtered like sheep by the Janjaweed, shocking the young survivors, but after a long and dangerous journey the moment the children may have thought that they finally reached safety on being rescued from the Mediterranean Sea they find themselves brutally beaten by Italian coast guards and put in an overcrowded refugee camp with adults with fights in the big queue for the little food provided - the ugly face of modern or contemporary Western civilisation. Hitler would be proud.

Western politicians willify foreign rapists and violent criminals, making it government policy to prioritise the deportation of foreign criminals, while non-foreign criminals do not receive the same priority and Western governments generously fund systematic violence and rape overseas through funding for dictators and concentration camps for migrants to keep them away from the Western world.

While the current UK government has expressed great concern about a few small boats of migrants crossing the Channel from France to the UK, the government did very little to stop the deadly coronavirus from spreading to the UK from outside UK borders with large amounts of people entering the UK with no monitoring of their potential virus infection with over hundred thousand people dying of the virus in the UK as a result - unrepentantly conpetent government!

The British government, like other Western governments, when it comes to controlling borders or 'taking back control' is like Humpty Dumpty:

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again.


In France, the only asylum-seekers generously welcomed are murderous dictators like Charles Taylor from Liberia, offered asylum by the French government even if he did not end up taking it up, according to Sir Desmond de Silva QC. Yet many people in Britain, including the government and many judges, continue to say or maybe even believe that France is a reasonably safe country for asylum-seekers. 

There was a time however when opening the borders was rather more popular than it is now in the Western world, as illustrated by the joke of Brigitte Bardot refusing to visit the S0viet Union unless the borders were open to which the S0viet leader Brezhnev enthusiastically replied "ah, Mademoiselle wishes to be with me alone à deux!" From Brezhnev to Brexit!

Verona, Italy

Maybe it is time to carry out a survey among migrants on which European country’s police batons taste best or worst to complement French President Jacques Chirac’s comments in 2005 on English cuisine being only the second worst after Finland. Maybe French police bâtons are only the second most painful en flagellant délit in the native country of the Marquis de Sade after those in the Balkans in flagrante delicto (wonders a very distant cousin of the 20th century Regent, Prince Paul of Yugoslavia, whose great-grandmother was Finnish). England and Finland may score similarly to cuisine (and let us not even go into football). Monsieur Chirac demonstrated how French diplomatic manners seem to be as fine as French child refugee policy, carrying on a long tradition, as Georges Bizet felt safer in the hands of the invading Royal Prussian Army than his fellow Frenchmen during the war of 1870.

The French President was not however entirely wrong to ridicule the English and the Finnish, as both nations considered it extremely bad table manners to take a piece of bread to finish off some tasty sauce from the plate, assuming they ever had anything tasty on their plates, until they saw someone French do that after which it became extremely civilised to do so, Babette's Feast of a kind... by the author of Out of Africa friherrinnan Karen von Blixed-Finecke where Babette is a French lady refugee who ends up in the remote western coast of Jutland in 19th-century Denmark, serving as cook to austere priest's daughters (very different from the austere priest's daughter Theresa May, the Chief Architect Albert Speer of the Hostile Environment) for the next 14 years, producing an improved version of the bland meals typical of the pious sect of the remote locality but after winning the lottery shows her gratitude for her protectors by throwing a lavish Parisian culinary feast of the kind she would have prepared as the head chef at the very appropriately named Café Anglais in Paris. As it happens one of the recipients of this feast was the Royal Swedish Cavalry General Lorens Löwenhielm whose noble aunt was the local Lady of the Manor, as a man of the world (terrible citizen of the world to horrify Theresa May) and former attaché in Paris, he is the only person at the table familiar with such cuisine, not afraid to use his hands to eat some of the dishes... cheerfully easing the austerity of the gathering ending up in a compassionate appreciation of not only the cuisine but the somewhat diverse individuals present.... (meanwhile the French seem to have sterilised their presidential inauguration ceremonies from the days of Pompidou (not to mention Pompadour) when the chain of the Grand Master of the Napoleonic Imperial Légion d'honneur was symbolically and physically literally taken off the departing president to be placed on the new president, now only shown like a museum piece at the ceremony, only the mounted Garde républicaine saving the grace, while in Finland the old and new president appear in front of the parliament still in white tie and tails in their full decorations as grand master of the national orders of chivalry also (mostly) predating the republic... not to mention British royal ceremonies.) 

On the Finno-Ugric theme of fraternal flattery, at the final showdown of communism collapsing in Eastern Europe the Hungarians were quick to run to the Austrian border but over a quarter of a century later the Hungarians are considerably less welcoming to anyone scrambling towards their borders - fine for some!

The pain of European police batons and refugee children living on the streets of Calais are maybe merely idyllic or the tip of the iceberg however compared to the systematic persecution of vulnerable migrants rather than villifying traffickers, arms dealers and dictators, by all western EU governments through the modern-day slavery and violent detention conditions of migrants, including children watching their mother being tortured to death in front of them for failing to pay politician-like greedy traffickers for their release, currently not only directly and knowingly but deliberately paid for by the EU in Libya in a kind of modern-day Guernica or even worse as it is not just a one-off bombing by a couple of rogue European states but horror continuing for years with the nouveau collaboration of the whole EU, most of the leading countries of human rights and freedom paradoxically. Racism and xenophobia seems to unite European politicians in this instance at least. The hostile environment is by no means a British invention but rather an import from the EU. 

"As long as the Arabs fight tribe against tribe, so long will they be a little people, a silly people, greedy, barbarous and cruel" (T. E. Lawrence).

It is 'a line drawn in water' between the internal and external affairs of a state, an expression ever more poignant with refugee children drowning in the seas around Europe now than when the fine Finnish Diplomat Max Jakobson expressed it, however much politicians and bigots may try to ignore it (the Jewish Jakobson served as an officer in the Finnish army during the second world war alongside German soldiers fighting against the Soviet Union). 

Guernica is the Basque Country town where Nazy Germany and Fascist Italy on request of Spanish nationalist rebels bombed civilians on 27 April 1937. This inspired Pablo Picasso to paint Guernica the same year, one of his best known paintings, exhibited in the Museo Reina Sofía in Madrid.

Maybe the EU should adopt a fascist symbol to symbolise itself more accurately? "[A]ll the sophistication of the West is only a veneer. Underneath it we are a violent people", said the Chief Minister of a nawab of princely India, a Russian refugee, Count Dimitri Bronowsky during the Second World War (The Day of the Scorpion by Paul Scott, p. 90). 'Walls built for refugees are like a drug with a momentary benefit but the disadvantage, the decline of European humanism, is permanent', said Finnish Conservative politician Kai Mykkänen in 2017. 

Or maybe the EU should adopt a Soviet symbol? Evil States restrict their borders like the Soviet Union with dense grim woods of pine trees oppressively planted near its borders while during the pre-revolutionary belle époque hardly anyone ever even had a passport. 

During the First World War, as Sir Harold Acton said, 'the passport, of which one had never heard before, suddenly became almost as vital as one's mortal soul: one could not move, officially one did not exist without a passport' (p. 50, Memoirs of an Aesthete). 

Most western politicians and their voters clearly do not mind (foreign) children being ill-treated, as long as the politicians' and their voters' own material comfort is cared for. National governments may have some defence in saying that they cannot alone solve global challenges (not that they are even trying necessarily) but the EU has even less of an excuse...


Indeed, the French republic has an impressive history of fascism, Légion d'horreur. Maurice Papon is a personification of this evil, the French civil servant and Gaullist politician. His long and successful career sprang from participating in the deportation of more than 1600 Jews from France to Nazi death camps, torturing insurgent prisoners in the Algerian War (1954–1962), overseeing the Paris police during the Paris massacre of peaceful Algerian demonstrators in 1961 and the February 1962 massacre at the Charonne metro station. In 1961, he was personally awarded the Légion d'honneur by President Charles de Gaulle. In 1998, Papon was convicted of crimes against humanity only in relation to his involvement with the deportation of the Jews (as an a... kicking footnote, C. de Gaulle was a very minor non-noble, so minor that he failed to serve the then Comte de Paris properly in restoring the only right monarchical form of government in France during his tenure as head of state... the continuation of the monarchy in France and elsewhere from the outset could have prevented much of the evil of the 20th century...)

There appear to have been no demonstrations in France against the deportation of Jews to Nazi death camps while anti-Semitism had been fairly popular in France. However in Germany at least some Berliners seem to have protested against the rounding up of Jews in 1942. Ich bin ein Berliner! Any assumption that Germans might be more Nazi than the French for example would seem questionably simplistic in a more complicated world.

Meanwhile during the Mau Mau Uprising (1952–1960) the British had concentration camps in Kenya to inflict torture on civilians, inter alia, not Britain's finest hour, not to mention de jure racial segregation in the US until as late as the 1960s. In Texas, the biggest church in a town could have hanging from the steeple a rope with an effigy of a black man (The Baroness by Hannah Rothschild, p. 250). What kind of perverse, arch heretic, devil worshipping, fake Christianity is that bigoted witch craft (no offense meant to bona fide devil worshippers)? Racism however is not the sole fault of white people. Some black people have been hostile to children of mixed white and black background, for example. On the other hand, adding to the complexities, Ian Smith as Prime Minister of Rhodesia has turned out to be rather idyllic compared to his post-colonial successor Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe. A simplistic one sided view will not help us much, antithesis should be taken to synthesis.

Modern or contemporary Western governments maintain regime of nouveau Apartheid where refugees and migrants are considered separate from the rest of humanity like the Black people under Apartheid regime in South Africa with which the modern or contemporary Western governments have little material difference in this respect.

No country or person can throw the first stone, but continued denial of past atrocities is no solution. One should take it philosophically. Not least a country as civilised as France should have the maturity to face its past, hopefully never to repeat the evils of the past, not to mention continuing them at present, like the current UK government recently seeking to decriminalise torture.

Only adding to the hypocrisy is to have compensated slave owners rather than slaves until as late as 2015 through repayment of state debt. What credibility does it leave with government, parliament and public authorities and voters to be trusted to defeat modern slavery, not to mention many consumers who are content to knowingly buying products of modern slavery. We all have a responsibility that we cannot simply delegate elsewhere. Refugees, immigrants, foreigners, natives, slaves etc. are no worse or better than the rest of humanity, all deserving equality of respect and opportunity.

At least something beautiful has come out of tragedy. Sami Nouri is a couturier who has worked with John Galliano and Jean Paul Gaultier. He came to France aged 15 as a refugee from Afghanistan seeing barbed wire on the many borders he crossed and that barbed wire has now in a considerably more beautiful form become a decoration in some of the clothes he has designed.   

But the stranger that dwelleth with you shall be unto you as one born among you, and thou shalt love him as thyself; for ye were strangers in the land of Egypt...
(Leviticus 19:34, King James Version)

As long as there is massive inequality in terms of wealth and basic safety across the world, with western "democracies" continuing to sell arms to dictators, there will be massive immigration across the world. It is of course entirely a matter of choice for those with the power and money to continue or discontinue mass immigration. Rather than dealing with the causes of mass migration, building little fences on borders is but petty bureaucracy and populism in a global reality which renders such parochial petty mindedness truly reactionary, inefficient and counterproductive.

In any event, the real threat to Europe and the Western World and all civilisation is not immigration but evil dictators like Communist Put[a]in. 


Like powder in a skilless soldier's flask,
Is set afire by thine own ignorance,
And thou dismembered with thine own defense.
(Shakespeare: Romeo and Juliet)

Musée d'Orsay, Paris 

The World-Beating Justice of the Dominatrix

The Son of the Sheik (1926, SOS, above)  is not of course to be confused with the  GDF SOBs of A...s with too much power and money. Appare...